Episode 17 - Happy Equinox - Time to Practice for Others

0:08 Welcome, you are listening to the podcast, a Resident Life produced by the time is now Productions. I am Mike Thompson, your host, and reflector and chief. In this podcast, we will discuss experiences and insights, from living a life devoted to uncovering the authentic self. And finding fulfilling purpose from the past, the present and the future. This podcast is a product of my life and experience and I'll share my opinions. Opinions between people are various and we don't all need to hold the same ones, but it is fun to hear the opinions of others as it gives us an opportunity to freshen up our own. If you enjoy and gain Insight from listening, Please Subscribe.

0:59 And share. If you have questions, please email them. And as always, nothing you hear here is a prescription or a prescription. It is a discussion of life and life's internal and external experiences. So, let's get to it. And welcome. I'm so happy you're here and listening today and I'm excited about today's conversation and topic. We've just passed the Equinox. So we're going to look deeply at how seasonal divides. Our spiritual markers gateways and pauses are timeouts.

1:44 This will help us to uncover more ways of living that help us reveal our authentic selves and live happier more fulfilling lives and doing so it will hopefully also Empower us to help others live happier and more fulfilling lives as well. So we just passed the vernal equinox in the northern hemisphere. It means the start of spring in the southern hemisphere. Of course. It's means the start of autumn In Japan, The Equinox is called Keegan. Well, if the equinoxes infect and Buddhist in Japan, Mark both, similarly, there's something to be learned from the way the Japanese approach, the seasonal divided, especially spiritually.

2:33 So in Japan, he Gan means literally other Shore. It's a derived from Sanskrit, historically. It is a holiday that not only marks the beginning of Spring and Autumn but it is also a day or period where ones for bears and ancestors are celebrated cherished, remembered and honored. The activities for doing this include not only cleaning family tombs and grave sites, But also amongst Buddhists offering prayers of spiritual consolation and Merit transfer. These practices are how the living extend spiritual ease and comfort.

3:25 It is also a way to offer one's Merit to the deceased. So that their existence, wherever they now exist or in whatever realm or life, they exist, is made better. The other Shore is the shore of Enlightenment, according to the Buddhists. So, it is honoring and remembering those who have gone before and praying, they reach, Enlightenment and whatever existence they are in at present. Solve this, of course, presumes a certain fundamental belief in reincarnation, which, of course, Buddhist have and belief. But for our purposes, we don't have to worry so much whether or not we believe in reincarnation.

4:12 We can sit with the knowledge that we are the products of all those who have gone before. So, he gun is also a time to renew, one's own, spiritual efforts, and practice. Renewing one's own aspiration to achieve enlightenment aspiring to achieve enlightenment. That's a big goal. Hard to take in hard to even get one's mind around. So as before in previous, episodes with big Buddhist Concepts, Instead of swinging for the bleacher.

4:55 So to speak. Let's focus first on our own individual aspirations and intentions to discover and uncover our authentic selves. In other words getting to know and uncover our own unique but a Nature's. So instead of like running for the goal of Enlightenment, we're going to try to better understand ourselves and uncover who we truly are our Buddha Nature's. I think for many people raised in the judeo Christian tradition and cultures strongly influenced by judeo. Christian Traditions, especially those raised in the west.

5:39 All of this is mostly a foreign concept. What is Merit and how does one offer it and how do the spirits of those gone before receive it those Spirits even exist. And what does this Merit do? For anybody. Same questions can be asked for Spiritual consolation how do prayers and offerings of spiritual consolation do anything to those who've passed away. As, with many things Buddhist. There are two ways to look at and understand these practices of spiritual consolation and Merit transfer. And the two ways are a literal way and a spiritual way. There's also a third way and that is a psychological way to look at it that while.

6:36 Not necessarily spiritual, it can have profound effects on people's lives specifically on our lives. The lives of the living us ourselves So let's take Merit, let's start there. I think we've talked about this before, but it always helps to go over it again. Merit in the Buddhist sense, is basically an accounting. The sum total of all the positive actions thoughts and words we've ever engaged in In a Buddhist sense.

7:17 Merit is accumulated. Not just in this life, but carries forward from all infinite previous lives. From beginningless time, but let's just focus on this life for now. After all it is the one we're living. This accounting of positivity just like water from a basin can be shared. So this Merit, this positivity. If you imagine it as water in a basin, or in a cup, or a bowl, you can share it out, right? And sharing it creates more, giving creates more by doing.

8:03 Good things, you increase Merit, it's a virtuous circle. giving freely unconditionally create some more of that, which is given and that's a wonderful thing to really understand and to embrace as a side note. This is why we often talk about breaking out of zero-sum mindsets and ways of thinking in a resonant, life. In a zero-sum mind, there is Never Enough ever its scarcity. And so we must horde, and couch and covet and keep it away from others.

8:51 Protect the self, the family, the clan, the group that shares the resources, the understanding of creating, and sharing, Merit belies all this, it's the opposite. If we have a pool of positivity, literally actions, we've taken in our lives or the effects of those at the positive effects of those actions and we can share that out and that creates more of the same just by doing it. Obviously we have an infinite Supply and so we need to override the natural scarcity mindset. and acknowledge and embrace this idea that by doing good, we create more good By giving Merit giving it away, we create more of it. But what is it that we share when we share merits, whether it is shared with the living, or the dead, like our ancestors, or with those, we know, like, family and friends or those, we don't know.

9:58 Such as victims of disasters. Everybody's prayed for the victims of disasters are hoped that they are suffering lessons that they're able to recover, right? So what we are sharing when we share our merit, with others Living Dead, what we are sharing is our sincerity Our sincere wish hope and prayer that suffering ends their suffering ends. And that, that Bounty comes And that disease and illness are healed.

10:46 That poverty is ameliorated. That want becomes plenty. Or more close to home that someone we love in our lives finds happiness, where there hasn't been much happiness, or our wish and hope a friend succeed, where maybe they have failed before. This is sincerity sincerity of intention. Setting our hearts and Minds with the wish, the hopes and the prayers.

11:29 That others will find. Peace happiness and prosperity. That they will have lives of safety that they will live without fear. Sincerity of intention is the first step to sharing Merit. But if we want to add a multiplier, a booster to the power of sharing Merit, then we need to act to take a concrete action. To take sincere actions on our wishes hopes and prayers. Physical concrete measurable actions, bring prayer into reality. A thought becomes a deed and as we've discussed before in previous episodes.

12:23 These actions don't have to be grand. Sweeping big swing actions. It's not like we have to give a zillion dollars to take care of some giant problem. Actions start with the most basic simple things. Action start with a smile. A helping hand. A kind word or gesture. A piece of advice or encouragement. The smallest of sincere actions to help and support are in reality, big swings.

13:06 Ultimately ultimately, they are actually world-changing. Because you've brought goodness into the world where maybe there wasn't before earlier. I mentioned that there was a literal spiritual and psychological way to look at sharing Merit. Spiritually sharing Merit is first believing that you have Merit to share that you have a well of goodness that you can dip into and share out. And actually it is more than believing you have Merit to share. It is having faith that you do and faith that it matters that you share it.

13:53 Faith that your efforts your contributions. You're very actions. Make a difference. This is spiritually sharing Merit. Okay, literal literally sharing Merit, this is putting it into action, physically doing things. Even if it is just a smile of encouragement to someone who needs that action action action concrete action with the sincere intent to be of help. That's literally sharing marriage action with a sincere intent to be of help. Now the psychological side of it, psychologically sharing mirror is a feedback loop.

14:44 The changes, the way we look at the world, our lives and our places in it. The more we consciously sincerely share Merit spiritually and literally. Do kind things without expectation of anything. The more we do this, the more our Baseline psychology shifts from being self focused and there we are again sort of in the realm of that zero-sum thinking. So our Baseline psychology shifts from being self-focused to being altruistically focused. Instead of focused in, we're focused out, think of a light that's pointing inside.

15:27 And turning it around and it shines outward. And the more our Baseline psychology shifts. the deeper our sense of spirituality becomes, and the deeper our spirituality, the more empowered, we feel to act, A virtuous circle. It's like nuclear fusion the way the the way Stars Burn the stars shine and burn with Fusion, start the reaction and it shines brighter and brighter and it continues. That's the virtuous circle.

16:10 Okay. Now, back to he guns specifically the equinoxes. There's another element to he gun and to sharing Merit and that is gratitude. Gratitude can be a happiness creation superpower when it is a focus of Our intention and attention. And we've talked a lot about gratitude in a Resident Life podcast. We've talked a lot about it here, and it is one of those frames of mind or mindsets that can unlock, so much positivity, creativity and joy. Okay, he got at this celebration of the Equinox, we intentionally and consciously, share merit with our ancestors.

16:58 And if you prefer instead of ancestors, we can say those who have gone before us and those whose lives led to us being who we are here now. So while the idea of revering ancestors might feel a bit alien to some. It is not such a stretch to think of those who've gone before. Right those who've gone before parents, grandparents great-grandparents but not even just relatives genetic or adopted but also teachers mentors. Kind strangers. All of the people in our lives living and dead have had some role in us, becoming who we are right now and where we are right now. And the lives we lead and have led thus far for better or worse.

17:59 And the idea here with the resident life is to find the better and to lift it up. And enhance it and to be grateful for how it came to be. So all that passed, all that came before Better or Worse. We want to find and lift up the better, enhance it, and then be grateful for how it came to be, and it even means taking the worse of the better or worse, and working some spiritual and psychological magic with my necks. Intention and sheer will to transmute the worse into better mind.

18:40 X intention is sheer. Will we are going to transmute the worse into better? So ends up being better and best. So with our efforts intention prayer, meditation and action. Becomes better and better instead of Better or Worse, better and better, and best. And let's just put it out there. Our lives are basically messy. Parts of our Lives might be great. Other parts might be awful. Most of us are somewhere in the middle and bounce back and forth.

19:21 Even But all of these parts, whatever state of better or worse, they may be in, they comprise the sum total of our lives and Who We Are. And it is up to us to work the psychological and spiritual magic to make them to make our lives, a bitingly happy, a bitingly happier. And gratitude for our lives for everything in our lives, for everything that we came from. Everything that we've made of it. Gratitude for the entire mess intentional, gratitude is how we can work out the ups and downs and discover and uncover. Abiding happiness.

20:17 Like sharing Merit was a virtuous circle. So is intentional gratitude? I'll be ready because intentional gratitude is challenging, it's hard. Sure, it's easy to feel grateful for the good things. The obvious blessings and kindness has shown us, but to feel grateful to cultivate gratitude for the awful, the - all that worst stuff. This is a whole order of something else. Essentially, it's a fake it until you make it endeavor. This is where we get into the realm of the Mind hack. So, let's approach it from two directions. First will be intentional gratitude, The second will be situational gratitude.

21:08 These are practices meditations to try and I hope you'll give it a try. It's okay. Intentional. Gratitude first sit quietly somewhere. And slow your breathing. Make a space. Find a time. Give yourself five to ten minutes. Just sit somewhere quiet. Breathe deeply into and out of your lower abdomen, push your breath down into the lower part of your body. And now, as you've calmed down, as you've slowed. Everything think of someone in your life. Think of someone who you don't have the Fondest Memories of. Maybe it was a childhood bully.

21:58 Maybe it is an X. Maybe this someone was a teacher who never gave you a fair Shake. Maybe a mean or thoughtless relative. Find someone in your memory. This is a meditation. Find a person. So find them then try to remember all the things they did to you, that you didn't like or all the things they did that were hurtful. Or that damaged your self-confidence, or your self-esteem? However, this type of meditation works for you dig into it, be concrete, make a list or a mental movie.

22:44 Get as much detail and feeling as you can into it. And when you've got it clear when it feels kind of fresh and painful, it's clear as you can get it. And, and it's really, you're really feeling it picture, the person, clearly in your mind in front of you, and then say, in in your heart and mind or even out loud say Yes. then say, thank you. then say, I accept, and I'm grateful.

23:26 And do it again. Yes. Thank you. I accept and I'm grateful to you. Okay why yes, why are we saying yes? Because this psychologically moves our minds to an affirmative, we put ourselves in a negative situation and we move our minds to an affirmative anyone in sales. Will tell you that when trying to make a sale, they will converse with customers and get them to agree to banal things. To say yes, this predisposes them to say, yes, when it comes time to make a sale, they are psychologically in a positive frame of mind and you want your mind in an affirmative State, then your heart is more open as well and you are more accepting and not in opposition.

24:31 Okay, thank you. Why are we saying thank you? What are we saying? Thank you for for making us feel awful. No, not that we are again intentionally and psychologically, moving our heart and mind into a position, a posture of openness of acceptance. Taking it one step further, it is like the word namaste in Hindi or namaskar in Sanskrit. It is an acknowledgement of the ultimate equality of everything and pays honor to the sacredness of all.

25:11 Isn't that a wonderful greeting, namaste? Acknowledging, the ultimate equality of everything and paying honor to the sacredness of all. even more, it's like namu in Japanese Buddhism namu is praised by owing to and honoring the sacred What is sacred life? Existence, doing our best. So, thank you. This is acknowledging that are relatively small situations are moments of infinite, existence, and they are sacred. This really difficult, isn't it? So finally, just we thought it was difficult, it's going to get more.

25:55 So finally, I accept and am grateful. So this is the psychological. How do you say this is the psychological period at the end of the proverbial sentence? It is an incantation that implies that situations happened between us. And we are the results today. We are the result today of those situations and we will move forward and Beyond This is how we made it today and this is where we're going. We accept it and even even if we don't actually feel sincerely grateful for this, we are using sincerity by doing the practice. So our egos create barriers to Wallace often protect us. Right?

26:47 But if we are sincere in our practice sincerity permeates, the membrane of our ego and takes over the ego is very porous. Very fragile. And by consciously doing things that are opposite to what, it's intending, they seep in and then they change. So it provides the conditions for authentic gratitude to, well, up in our hearts and Minds by faking it, until we make it with practice over time. Don't stop, keep doing it. It's not a flip, the switch kind of thing, it's an erosion kind of thing. You got to do it over and over and over and practice it and it's going to get better and it's going to get easier. And suddenly one day, boom, like a flower gratitudes going to Blossom in your heart in your mind and with gratitude comes Joy.

27:41 For achieving this moment of insight and Awakening. Okay, next, that was the first one now situational gratitude. So what is this practice? This is a practice of spontaneity of Awakening to living differently. This is a practice in action, it's using. Yes, thank you. I accept but doing so in our daily lives, as we go about everything we do in a day. Bringing this to every situation meeting encounter. Say, someone bumps into you? Yes. Thank you. I accept not out loud. Obviously, everybody would freak out but in your heart and your mind, say something goes not your way at a meeting or at work. Yes.

28:31 Thank you. I accept. Say you have a quarrel with a child or a partner or spouse. Yes. Thank you. I accept. The Barista screws up your coffee order. Yes, thank you. I accept. Your spouse pushes your buttons one more time. Yes. Thank you. I accept. Get it. At first, maybe you'll just growl but keep trying. Maybe you'll only get yes for a while. Maybe the thank you and I except can't come. That's all right. Yes. Yes.

29:11 Start with that step by step. Keep working on. Thank you and I accept will be possible eventually. Can't take three steps until you take the first. Can't take three steps till you take the first in the second practice, in both practices intentional. Gratitude, meditation and situational gratitude action must be practiced together. Like burning coals one coal alone, will go out to Cole's, together, burn and burn. We're back to that Fusion thought again. I've been doing this practice for a long time and I've struggled with both, I still struggle.

29:54 But struggling. Is the point, isn't it? That's the whole point. If we're not struggling, then we're not making progress, not moving forward. So, step by step. Day by day. Situation by situation. Person by person. We work to move forward. in the side benefit is when you can truly in your heart, forgive those in your past who have hurt or wronged you you're able to then feel compassion for them and wish them more happiness in their lives, where maybe before you only had disdain or contempt, Now, you can sincerely wish for happiness for them. We humans we hurt each other all the time intentionally and unintentionally and if we can forgive others and eventually feel compassion, for others, even ones who have hurt us. Then we are more likely and able to forgive ourselves for the Hertz.

31:10 We ourselves have caused others. And we can also feel compassion for ourselves. Will delve into this topic in another future episode. It's also a deep way of practice that leads to positivity. it's its own topic for deep discussion, but for now, For now happy Equinox. Everybody happy seasonal divided. I hope you've got something to take away from listening today. It's been a bit long and I've given you a lot of homework. And I'm going to do the homework to.

31:51 So when we put this all into practice, it will lead to a life of joy and happiness beyond what we can imagine. And isn't that a wonderful thing? Thank you so much for listening. Thank you for listening. If you enjoyed this podcast and want to hear more, please subscribe, and share. If you'd like to share your own experience. Thoughts or ask a question. Please send an email to Mike at resonant dot social. With gratitude, theme music is courtesy of stock audios. Distributed by pixabay a resident. Life, is a podcast from the time is now Productions.